On language

The thing I like about the English language is the versatility it allows. The Anglosphere stretches all the way around the globe, and with such diverse speakers, the total number of words in the English language soars beyond word totals of all other languages.

The number of words in the English language is difficult to pin down, given the number of medical and technical terms, as well as word derivatives (run, ran, running, etc.). That said, scholars tend to put the total count between 500,000 and 1.5 million.

Combine such a vast vocabulary with such diverse speakers coining new words everyday, and you have expressive power.

For instance, one doesn’t have to drink beer. One can chug it, pound it, imbibe it, swill it, or, should one find oneself in the company of ruddy faced Bavarians, quaff it. But these can all be found easily in a thesaurus. If one truly masters language, one can balk at such infantile insults as ‘asshole,’ and upgrade to the wonderfully graphic “gall-faced twat.”

To truly savor the expressive power of the English language, however, one must consider the word "intoxicated." Off the top of my head, I can think of 20 synonyms:

1. wasted
2. blind
3. pissed
4. smashed
5. blitzed
6. blattoed
7. hammered
8. shitfaced
9. plastered
10. obliterated
11. gone
12. shitwrecked
13. sloshed
14. soused
15. drunk
16. inebriated
17. lit
18. tanked
19. fucked up
20. bent off one's face
    

Last night at Paul's going away party in Trout Run, Pennsylvania, I do believe I achieved all 20 states of intoxication.

Sigh... You can take the kid out of college...